Five Poems. One Emotion (Parts I and II)

Part I.

Embittered sand strikes relentlessly at my cold fingers
Tiny rocks forced into small cuts in my feet
Sandstone grinds my solid grip
Annoying little shells
Sea salt

Blindingly sublime light cascades onto my naked body
The shadows of gnarled trees delight my eyes
Aching for home and my feet hurt
Wilder land ahead
Wrong direction

Felicitous faces voices surround my obliviated head
Obviously they are hiding something
Deep in their confident hearts
Resenting something
Or I am?

All stand all rise all recite the glorious Psalter
Confession starts when the floor meets my knees
The solid floor serves my Saviour
I wish I could sink
Unnoticed

The arch of a roller coaster track jumps in my chest
My heart whisps faster than my weary mind
The darkness of night in my soul
My uncomfortable friends somewhere
Alone.

Part II.

(Written nearly ten years later)
My cold fingers hold on to a plastic pail
A flimsy shovel in my other hand, as
The ocean begs for us to rebuild.
Crashing waves
dissolution.

I walk on paths littered with light
that streams through the branches
of the redwood trees at noon.
Wilder land ahead
Adventure

Felicitous faces voices surround my obliviated head
Obviously they are hiding something
Deep in their confident hearts
Resenting something.
Let it go.

Stained glass, old wooden pews, silver-haired people.
Get off of your strong, bleeding knees
There was no sin you committed
No fall from grace
You are seen.

The crackling electricity of two live wires sparks in my heart
One wire is the power of God Themself
One wire is my own
I touch them together
Fire.